Yesterday evening we had an appointment
for a preconception visit with one of the midwives at the birth
center that we visited a few weeks ago. I was a bit anxious and
nervous about this appointment because I was still concerned that my
health conditions would make them nervous and say that they couldn't
accept me as a patient. So, I formulated my list of questions, had my
list of medications and supplements printed out, and was trying to be
as prepared as possible. Unfortunately, the appointment didn't go as
well as I would have hoped, but it also wasn't as bad as I had
feared.
We got to meet with the midwife and a
student midwife. Right off the bat I told them a little about my
health situation and handed over my list of medications. The
medications themselves don't seem to be a problem, but because
handling patients with chronic Lyme disease is fairly new for them,
they couldn't guarantee that I would be able to work with them and
give birth at the birth center. They want me to see a maternal fetal
specialist (or going to a Lyme literate OB/GYN would have also been
an issue) to get a determination of whether it will be safe for me to
give birth there. They have someone that they have an informal
relationship with who apparently respects the mother's wishes so he
wouldn't just automatically say that I needed to be in a hospital
(which is my fear) so the midwife will be calling him today to give
him a little information about me and see if I would be able to see
him before actually being pregnant. And then she'll call me sometime
early next week, most likely. Then I'll see this specialist and one
of three options is like: a) I'm told that I'm high-risk and need to
give birth in a hospital; b) I'm told that I'm NOT high-risk and will
be cleared to give birth at the birth center (or wherever I choose);
or c) I'm told that I'm not high-risk but that I should really be
followed by this specialist in addition to being able to work with
the midwives and give birth at the birth center. Obviously, I'm
hoping for option b but I would take c just as easily and if it comes
down to a, I'll deal with that.
So, another step to take in this
process. And my anxiety and nervousness continues and will most
likely continue until I've seen this new doctor and gotten some
answers from him. My fear is that I will be deemed high-risk and told
that I have to give birth in a hospital. That isn't the end of the
line as far as options go. I could go to a few other birth centers
and see what they think. I could explore homebirth. There is a place
in Tennessee (The Farm) where they might be more willing to take me
on as a patient. But the bottom line is that if I am actually deemed
high-risk, I see it as unlikely that anyone outside of a hospital
would be willing to work with me. I'm trying really hard not to jump
immediately to that scenario. I know that giving birth in a hospital
wouldn't be the end of the world, but right now it is so far from
what I want that it's hard to be okay with that. I have looked into
the hospitals around here and there is one that has natural birth
rooms with birth tubs and would be okay if I needed to go that route.
I am trying to remain as calm as
possible and focus on the fact that whatever happens, it won't change
us moving forward to have a baby. I may just have to alter my idea of
what the birth will be like. Again, not the end of the world but just
a bump in the road. I'm used to bumpy roads. I just wish, for once,
something could be easy.
I'll update again when I know more
about this specialist and what the next step(s) will be.
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